Yes… I do believe that we can succeed in getting anything we want if we believe (truly believe) that we are capable. If you are somewhat like me–and I dare say a lot of us are alike in this respect–you know that we spend most of our lives trying to make sense of everything around us.
We become like robots…
From the time we are born we mimic the actions of our parents. We are like little automatons–duplicates who try to make sense of the world through the eyes of our parents. Unknowingly, our parents deprive us of the food for your thoughts needed so we can develop into spiritually strong and confident beings.
Out Of The Norm Parents
Unfortunately, we are not allowed to exercise the free-will handed to us, since our parents always “know best.” Of course, there are exceptions. Here and there you will find a truly accomplished adult because his/her parents had an unusual way of raising children. “It’s-okay-to-let-the-baby explore-the-territory” kind of thinking. This out of the norm parent believes in supervising the child and offering sound advice only as needed; letting the child form his/her own judgments and opinions, thereby allowing the child to arm with the knowledge and know-how that will work best in making the right decisions throughout life. What I call “food for your thoughts.”
This is not a criticism to parents who subscribe to the previously mentioned mode of child-rearing. It is just making a point. The brain needs stimulation to develop and experience wholly, so it can become strong enough and be the real master of matter, capable of using free will and thereby developing the wisdom to make the right decisions throughout our lives from an early age. With the loving, supportive, and emotionally-reinforcing parent supervision, of course.
I believe that for many, this is the reason we don’t know how to recognize our truly outstanding capabilities at an early stage of life. Instead, we go through infancy, childhood, and most of adulthood trying to decipher life–what a waste of time considering that our life here is so short!
I Welcome your thoughts.
14 Replies to “Food For Your Thoughts”
Great Article! Indeed, we are capable of using more of our brain that we do. We are program a certain way since birth. We have to reprogram our mind and use it to its fullest!
Developing self awareness at an early age is crucial! Hopefully parents will become more open to consider this and try it, so we can look forward to more emotionally stable adults. Thanks for your thoughts Carole :))
Very interesting and I never thought about child nurture like this. I like the parent exercising free-will on the child. It allows them to develop an early sense of independence and exploration. I find children are then more capable of entering different situations or circumstances alone without the need to be babied.
Indeed, children are capable much more than we think! Children who are encouraged to really get acquainted with their environment and surroundings develop self-awareness at an earlier age; they will be better equipped to make sound decisions later on in life. Do you have children Rob?
I do agree that it is a blessing to have parents and other Bigs around you who encourage free-wheeling and self-congruence as you grow up. Getting an early start on that is such a bonus. My beloveds who’ve had the benefit of that kind of upbringing are amazing sorts.
I have found, however, that also knowing how to navigate through other people’s thoughts and mindsets that do not match up with how you see the world are important skills that should not be completely discounted.
Sometimes I watch friends who had a freer-thinking upbringing than my own trying to (often unsuccessfully) negotiate the gap between their own Real and what those who had a more rigid upbringing believe/think/feel. There is no meeting-of-the-minds and connection falls short even between people of good will.
Also, sometimes the way to self-congruence comes from busting out of the cage that is not of your making. It’s a harder path, but the roots go deeper, it seems to me.
There has to be a way to do both, I suppose — keep a child cognizant of and congruent to their own self-definition as well as helping them to tolerate others who have a different mindset.
Thank you for sharing your truly realistic insight Netta! I completely agree with your point… there must be exposure to others’ ways and views because that in itself is the gauge with which one can form one’s unique identity. I am glad you bring this up because it makes a point of my belief that there has to be equilibrium in everything. Emotional balance opens the door to happiness–encouraging emotional balance from an early age results in acceptance of others, as well as self-integrity.
Based on my experience with this kind of thing with parents I tried to do the best I could letting my kids roam. But society put limits down anyway. I homeschooled them then they wanted to go to school like other kids then I let them explore and get traumatized by that lol Now they are back to homeschooling haha. It is a free program called “self design” but the ministry of education has been putting down more and more regulations of the freedom they can have as they get older. I am trying to let them do what they want but its hard sometimes, and they as teens now seem to think I still limit and try to control them. I tell them ‘you ain’t seen nothing compared to grandma’ lol.
So now I’m trying to show them as I learn myself, that freedom is going to be a state of mind. Nive post. I think it sums up the issues we all face so well.
I know Gordon… It’s not easy. Unfortunately we’re faced up against systems which have been put in place responding to the same robotic thinking. I’m not sure about how homeschooling could contribute though… how would the children interact with the open world to experience life in full? Remember that there is a crucial time during the first six years. That is when the child “forms” a way to start making sense of the world.
What an interesting thought of how we all grow up. I can relate to this to some extent, as when I think back to growing up, I can truly see how much my parents tried to control how I thought. Especially with religion, they would always try to install how the world works, without ever letting me try and attempt to think for myself. Of course, they were really acting in love, but this is the case for far too many kids growing up. For myself honestly, I could never make sense of things through religion, which caused a lot of confusion in my life growing up.
Thank you so much for your thoughts Jacob! I sincerely identify with you, especially in the matter of religion. My family’s traditional religion was forced upon me; but even as a child, I always had my doubts and just knew that I had to expand my views about religion until I made sense of things for myself. I had too many doubts and unanswered questions. I hope my post brings parents more awareness about allowing their children to make sound choices.
I do agree that kids should be allowed to exert free will with the guidance of an adult. Kids lack full cognitive ability until they are around the age of 7. So until that time they must be guided.
However, every child is different and some kids need structure more than others.
You are so on point Lane! This is why it is critical for parents to consider how they want to raise their future children because they grow FAST. To be able to plant the roots during the first six years, parents need to be ready with this mindset. Let’s remember that this traditional pattern of child rearing is already part of many of us, because that’s how WE were raised and that’s the experience we have. It is a challenge for parents, especially for children needing more structure… but worth it!
Awesome post!! Wow, this has a lot of valuable insight in it.
At times I have noticed the robot mentality kick in, but I have been putting in a lot of mental work to make sure that it does not become common.
Me and my wife are on the path to be the out of norm parents, I cannot wait to see where our son is able to take himself 🙂
Thanks for your kind comment Gabe. My wish is that more parents consider this out of the norm way of child rearing. I wasn’t lucky enough to have this type of upbringing, so as a teenager I promised myself that when I had a child I would raise him/her differently, which I did with my daughter. Today I am a proud mother! How old is your son?